Ngarwul, ‘to look’ in Yorta Yorta language, is a 13 minute sound journey, and portal to connect with mother nature through the recordings of birds, wind, water and the spirit within. I looked, listened, felt, sensed, learned, responded, acted and reacted. Ngarwul is a cultural interaction that shares ancient knowledge and Indigenous ways of being.

After creating this work, I titled it Ngarwul, which I thought meant ‘to listen’, but when yarning with Dhoma Nynini Djetja (my dear Aunty Lou*), I learned about Gulpa Ngawar-l ...

“Gulpa Ngawar-l is the combined Yorta Yorta terms for ‘deep looking and listening.’ In Yorta Yorta gulpa is ‘deep’, ngawar is ‘to listen’ and ngawal is ‘to look’... to Indigenous people it is an important way of being in the world and not exclusive to the Yorta Yorta.
... for example, let us look at the English term Deep Listening. It explains the way in which to listen. Conceptually, in English, we listen only with our ears and deeply inferring that we focus on what we are listening to. The Yorta Yorta term Ngawar-l is a double meaning to both looking and listening simultaneously, it furthers the definition with the addition of the other senses of touching, tasting, feeling and even further depth of instinctual action. The terminology in English still has its limitations, and fails to some extent to relay the depth and understanding” p20 of Dr Lou Bennett’s Thesis; Lotjpa Yorta Yorta! Retrieving, Reclaiming and Regenerating Language and Culture through the Arts.
During Melbourne’s 6th lockdown (September/October 2021), my mental health slipped into a very dark place. I was doing a lot of meditation, using mindfulness apps, trying to reduce the intense feelings of anxiety and depression but wasn't able to stay present or make sense of anything. Although the practice of mindfulness was helpful, I just couldn’t get into the soundscapes, and came to the realisation that not many First Nations artists are creating music in the ‘ambient’ genre. With the rate of mental health issues in the world today, especially those experienced by First Nations people, I felt it would be deadly to create something not just for me, but for all of us.

Without consciously knowing about Gulpa Ngarwar-l, I used my own instinctual action in my performance on the double bass. My improvisation was a response to the recordings from the Darebin Creek behind Northland Shopping Centre, Preston on Wurundjeri Woi Wurrung Country. This was a place I went to to re-ground myself, listen, breathe and look within. Ngarwul is a work of resilience and survival, a commitment towards inner peace. It is a diary entry, a time capsule, it is lockdown, freedom, depression, connection and healing. Finally, it was my world when I was desperately looking for a shimmer of hope, when it was hard to see the light.

It is a gift to you, to practice Gulpa Ngarwa-l …


*Djetja Lou, Senior Yorta Yorta, Dja Dja Wurrung song woman Dr Lou Bennett AM, Westpac Research Fellow of University of Melbourne